I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Walk of Shame today included voting.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
