singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I'm sobbing to NWA
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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