dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
