i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize