I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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