Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
