Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
