I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
