they need to just BURY HIM!
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
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