Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
