He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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