Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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