why didn't you poke me back
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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