Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.

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(330): View more from Ohio

this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away

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(917): View more from New York City

WISH UPON A TAMPON

(718): View more from New York

They constantly get farther than me.

(718): View more from New York

tampons.

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(407): View more from Florida

he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around

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17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Read it at the TFLN blog
(518): View more from New York

i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober

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(512): View more from Texas

Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.

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(313): View more from Michigan

Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.

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