i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
