Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
