Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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