: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
