I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
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Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
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I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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