24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize