no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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