we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
