8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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