I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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