hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
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