i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the cops told us we were all naked.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3 2 1 whiskey
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize