Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
