after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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