I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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