It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
