Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
