garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
you made out with another girl for some wings
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