pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
