but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize
