True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
