so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
