I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Dick very happy bro
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
