When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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