You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
and you fell through a lawn chair
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
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