Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
