she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
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