guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Randomize
