I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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