Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
