Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize