I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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