Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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