I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
