Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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