When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I wanna passion pit in your ass
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
