all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Randomize
