Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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