that's an acceptable place to lick
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
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